Facebook posts and Tweets from Salemites, Part 25

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Facebook post from Kate to Bill Horton: Our grandson Will might still be alive.

Reply from Bill: What??? No one told me he died! By the way, has anybody heard from my nephew David lately? And I left a message for Bo, but he still hasn't gotten back to me.

Reply from Kate: Uhhh.....
 
Facebook post from Sami: Hey Salem! I'm home! Brought all of my kids, too: Chelsea, Jenna, Barbara, Malia, Sasha, Don, Eric, Ivanka, Tiffany and Baron. They're all so excited to see you guys again!

Reply from Marlena: Sami, dear..... Oh, never mind. Welcome home, honey.
 
Tweet from the detective whose job was saved when Bo Brady left the Salem P.D. to other members of the group formerly known as "Mock Rafe, and then "Mock D.A. Kiriakis," and now known as "Mock Ex-Con Hope": OMG, did you hear the latest? Ex-con Hope carelessly let screechy Sami take her gun and then stood by as the idiot assaulted an old man and pointed a gun at him!

Reply from member 2: And the ex-convict immediately reinstated that little twerp, JJ Deveraux, after he pointed a loaded gun at the face of a cuffed prisoner, crazy Ben Weston.

Reply from member 3: And instead of promoting somebody she gave the open detective position to FBI-reject Eli Grant, who just happens to be the son of Mayor Abe's main squeeze. Do I smell cronyism?

Reply from member 4: This is enough to make me nostalgic for the regime of kissless wonder Commissioner Roman Brady. I'm going to drown my sorrows at the Pub. Anyone care to join me?

Reply from member 2: Sorry, but I'm on duty. I'm driving over to Salem Park to take a nap.
 
And instead of promoting somebody she gave the open detective position to FBI-reject Eli Grant, who just happens to be the son of Mayor Abe's main squeeze. Do I smell cronyism?
Reply from member number 5: Word is, Eli Grant is also Hope's great-nephew. But who can tell with that twisted family tree? Did you know her stepmom is also her sister? To quote the kissless wonder, Roman Brady, "what da' hell??"
 
Facebook post from Kayla to Sami: Honey, it's nice to see you, but where are your children? You've not mentioned them once since you've been home.

Reply from Sami: I have too! I talk about my kids all the time. As the matter of fact, here's a new picture of them

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Reply from Steve: Uh, Samantha, those aren't your kids. Those are the von Trapp children.

Reply from Sami: My kids aren't trapped anywhere! They are with their nanny! Look, here's her picture:

Mary%2BPoppins-farewell.jpg


Reply from Kayla: But Sami, that's.. [cut off]

Reply from Steve: Never mind, Sweetness. Not worth it.
 
Facebook post from Chad: So help me God, Andre. If Theo doesn't make it, I will see you behind bars forever.

Reply from Andre: How dare you blame me?? I love Theo very much. He's my nephew, my flesh and blood. I wouldn't hurt a hair on his head. How could you accuse me of such a monstrous act?

Reply from Chad: Didn't you murder our sister, Renee, in cold blood?

Reply from Andre: Uhhhhh.... so how 'bout those Chicago Bears??
 
Second reply from Andre: On second thought, let's forget the Bears. They're 3-6 and last in the NFC North. More to the point those awful things that people are always throwing in my face were done by the "old" Andre, not the "new" one who's a defender of family values, not to mention truth, justice, and the American way.

Reply from Chad: Oh, puhleeze.

Reply from Andre: Come now, little brother. Contrary to what that foolish Samantha Brady thinks, Elvis never changed, but I have. I'm the good DiMera.

Reply from Abigail: Chad, dear, please give Andre a chance. He's nothing like that cheap womanizer, EJ.

Reply from Sami: Shut up, you man-stealing tramp. And Chad, you stinker, how dare you say my smoochy-moochy never changed. I HATE both of you!

Reply from Susan: Andre, you're mean, mean, mean. My darling baby boy is perfect, perfect, perfect in every way despite evil, evil, evil Stefano's best efforts. Come to Memphis and see for yourself.

Reply from Chad: At times like these, I wonder if I have been better off if I'd stayed a Peterson-Woods.
 
Facebook post from Eli: Wow, so I just had a cousin return from the dead. Mind blown! How often does that happen to someone? Crazy!

Reply from Julie: More often than you'd imagine, darling. Now, if only my dear, dear Nicky would return from the grave. Sigh.

Reply fro Gabi: :angry:
 
Facebook post from Calliope to Eugene: where are you this time?!?!

Reply from Eugene: where I always am. Catch me if you can.
 
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Facebook post from Sami: My mom, John, Lucas and even Will can go suck lemons! I don't know why they're all so mad at ME? All I did was try to help my son get his memory back so he could remember me, Salem's best mother. Geez Louise, they act like I did something terrible. That's what I get for having such a brilliant idea. I HATE THEM! Bunch of doodyheads.
 
Reply from Marlena: Sami dear, please take a minute to reflect. What you did was more than ill-advised. Will might have been killed.

Reply from Sami: Who told you to say that, John Black or Lucas? I HATE those stoopid doodyheads -- especially John. Besides everything was under control. I had guards standing by.

Reply from Sami's thugs: Oh no we weren't. We were outside the room. Ben could have killed your kid before we could react.

Reply from Sami: SHUT UP, you hired goons. I knew exactly what I was doing. Sami Brady is NEVER wrong!! NEVER! I HATE you both.

Reply from Marlena, John, Lucas, and Will: :sick::sick::sick::sick:
 
Facebook post from EJ DiMera Will Horton: OMG! :eek: Why didn't anybody tell me I was a jerk and cheated on my husband Sonny with Paul, who is apparently my Aunt Belle's brother? I'm a horrible person! What else have I done?

Reply from Brady: might not want to tug at that thread, buddy.

Reply from Marlena: Will, dear, we've all done things in our pasts we'd rather not dwell on. Let's just focus on the here and now.

Reply from John: That's a fact!

Reply from Roman: Dammit, Sami!

Reply from Lucas: Son? You're still alive and real, right??

Reply from Sami: Who was the stoopid doodyhead to tell Will about that???

Reply from Belle: Sorry, I did, but he was bound to find out.

Reply from Sami: I HATE YOU!!! PS: MY Rafe is still the best lover! :love:

Reply from Hope: WHAT???? :angry:
 
Reply from Belle: Sorry, I did, but he was bound to find out.
Reply from Marlena: Will, dear, we've all done things in our pasts we'd rather not dwell on. Let's just focus on the here and now.
Reply from Sami: Yeah, just like Belle wouldn't exist if you hadn't cheated on Daddy with that life-ruiner, John Black. So there, Belle! See, I figured Will was bound to find out.

Reply from EJ DiMera Will Horton: Dear Lord, what kind of family am I in?? My grandmother cheated on my grandpa?

Reply from Sami: If your other grandmother hadn't had an affair with your Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Mike's dad, your dad wouldn't exist either. Oh yeah, and she was a hooker.

Reply from EJ DiMera Will Horton: :cry:
 
Reply from Sonny: Don't cry Will. My loving arms will help you forget your awful family. And please, let me dry your tears.

Reply from Paul: No, Sonny, no. How can you forget me so quickly. :cry:

Reply from Sonny: Get a grip, Paul. You're starting to sound like the old weeping Will Horton -- the one I went to Paris to get away from.
 
Facebook post from Sami: I HATE Belle! I hate Carrie, too. They are both stoopid hags. From now on, my favorite sister is Cassie.

Reply from Cassie: Why?? What did I ever do to you?? Can I decline that "honor"?
 
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