Random Thoughts of Salemites, Part 3

Sonny: Let's see here. "How To Get Revenge On Deimos For Kidnapping My Friend and the Mother of My Child, Then Getting Me Kidnapped And Almost Beaten": Hmm. "Toilet paper and egg his house (bedroom?), short-sheet his bed, prank call him, draw crude things over his sheet music, put superglue on his piano keys and the piano bench, put Nair in his shampoo, put hot pink hair dye in his shampoo, put orange skin dye in his shower gel. "Hmm. What else? Ooh! "Have sex with Paul all over his bedroom." Oh, that is diabolical! I love it!
 
Deimos: Would kidnapping Abby and Gabi be a good idea? After all, my last kidnapping venture proved pointless. Oh, whatever. As the old saying goes, try, try, and try again.

Brady: Is skipping out on Tater Tot to be with Nicole a good idea? Oh, why not. Sami was always dumping her kids on Caroline and things seemed to have worked out all right. As far as I know, none of them has a record -- yet.

Chad: OMG, Gabi and Abby are missing. Did Deimos kidnap them? Nah, the writers wouldn't dare use that trite plot device yet again.

Chloe: Holly is my baby. Holly is my baby. Hmm, I wonder if Eduardo likes my low-cut top. Holly is my baby. Holly is my baby. Kate is a hag. Holly is my baby. Holly is my baby. I think I'll have another drink. Holly is my baby.
 
Dario: Why is Dad so interested in Kate? Why can't he be like other middle-aged fools and go chase a woman half [h]is age?

Victor: Should I remove Deimos as head of Titan? Nah, it's too much fun watching Sonny throw a hissy fit about him.

Abigail: Chad loves Gabi more than me. Chad loves Gabi more than me. Chad loves Gabi more than me. :cry:

Tripp: What's worse, learning that my Dad killed my saintly, misunderstood Mom, or living in a loft with a bunch of really boring teens? Anyway, as soon as Angelo brings me my bucks, I'm moving to a penthouse in the sky.

Rafe: OMG, Hope is a bigger criminal than Bo Brady ever was. Will sticking with her ruin my already shaky career? Oh, well, as Roman would say, "what da hell."
 
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Nicole: It's too bad Hope is a cop. Otherwise, I'd invite her here to shoot Scooter. Sami? Sami shot that guy who was going to kill Rafe. Nahh, she won't help me since I "kidnapped" Holly. Gabi? Yeah, maybe Gabi would be cool with this. She killed Nick when he was trying to attack her. But then she'd tell Rafe and he's a cop. Marlena? She could push him out of a window. That might work. Eric? Yeah, maybe, just maybe I can get him drunk and have him drive Scooter somewhere. I hear through the grapevine that Joey Johnson killed Ava. Maybe I can invite him here on the downlow to smother Scooter. Too bad Victor hates me, because he'd have Scooter killed for the fun of it.
 
Xander: Why am I wasting time tormenting Nicole when I could be in Athens picking up hotties at clubs and bars. Next time, Uncle Deimos can handle his own dirty work.

Harold: Oh my. I'd better call Father Louis. If Mr. Chad brings home that cursed amulet, the mansion will need an exorcism.

Tripp: Should I trust what Jade says about Kayla? She does seem kind of sketchy. Nah, she must be telling the truth. After all, it couldn't be Steve and Joey are cool dudes.

Roman: Rats. Even tending bar at the Pub hasn't gotten me a kiss. Maybe, the Pub should host a social event for the Salem Senior Center ladies. One of them is sure to go for me.
 
Deimos: Gee, people really seem to hate me, and I just can't understand why.

Sonny: I really am a tough CEO. I really am a tough CEO. I really am a tough CEO.

Brady: Jeannie Theresa who?

Theo: Love and romance just aren't what they're cracked up to be. Maybe, I should talk to Eric about how to become a priest.

Ghost Daniel: Great news, Brady survived. This means, to quote the old Celine Dion song, "My heart will go on."
 
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Rafe: Hey, was that Deimos walking by us? Nah, it couldn't be. That guy had grey hair, a mustache, and a beard.

Raines: Where's Hope Brady? I thought I'd chained her to her desk.

Anne: Are Jenny and Adrienne ever going to show up for work or do I have to run the Spectator all by myself? And who in the name of God is Anjelica Deveraux?

Rory: I hope there's a reward for ratting out the Candyman. I could use the money. I hear that there's some quality pot for sale in Salem Park. :)

Abigail: I wonder if people are getting bored listening to me explain why I had to leave Chad. Nah, I don't think so. I'm a fascinating person.

Ghost Will: Who is this person impersonating Sonny? My true love would never have fired people en masse, babbled about leadership, or paraded around wearing some tacky amulet.
 
Anne Milbauer: Are Jenny or Adrienne ever going to show an interest in running the Spectator? Hopefully not. Right now I can do what I want, including taking long, alcohol-fueled lunches. By the way, I wonder what Lucas is doing now?

Anjelica: Why oh why did I ever recruit those two idiots, Bonnie and Hattie?

Eric: Woe is me, woe is me, woe is me :sad:.

Horton Cabin Raccoons: Hey, we've gotten through the whole summer without one visit by Salem humans! Life is good!

Roman: What da hell, these breakfast burritos are selling like hotcakes. Who knew they were so popular? Maybe, I should turn the place into a Mexican-themed bar that also offers chowder with nachos, Brady burgers with salsa, and Wanchai Ferry spiced up with jalapenos.

Victor: Who cares who killed Deimos. He's dead and I'm rid of him. Case closed. Time for a drink.

John: OMG, now Doc and I are being held captive in some mental hospital. Why can't we ever get some peace? Life stinks! That's a fact!
 
Houdini: Sorry, John, I've been watching Days for years from the next life, and I can assure you that you're no Harry Houdini.

Raines: That Myron looks like he's afraid of his own shadow. Can I trust him? Yeah, nobody would dare cross me after I give them my best scowling, threatening frowny face.

Lani: OMG, OMG, is that a goat over there?!:eek::eek::eek:

Hattie: I hate posing as Marlena. Even worse than wearing her awful clothes is not being able to put my elbows on the table while I scarf up my meals and not being able to talk with my mouth full of mashed potatoes or Cheesy Puffs.

Hope: Why does Rafe always get to be the bad cop when we pull the good-cop-bad-cop routine? Guys get to have all the fun.
 
Roman: Good grief, things have really been a mess at police headquarters since I retired. Oh well, as King Louis XIV once said, "apres moi le deluge."

Abe: Should I appoint Hope police commissioner? After all, she's a convicted felon. Oh, why not, I once appointed Bo Brady to the job and he was the biggest felon in Salem.

Abe: Should I hire Eli for the police force and make Rafe police commissioner? Why not, they're both good friends. On the other hand, doing it would make the Salem P.D. look like a dumping ground for washed-up FBI agents.

Brady: I should definitely remain as Titan CEO. Pompous Sonny is such a power-mad little twit. He's so controlling that he'd probably want Paul to quit his job if it involved being around handsome gay men. What kind of person would do such a thing?
 
Sami's mind continues to wander as she ponders events since her return.

What's the deal about me maybe causing Dr. Rolf to kill himself? Everyone knows that the old goat will come back to life sooner or later.

Good grief, old, old Granny Hope was really being difficult about me making the Memphis trip. She's more senile than I thought.

Why is stoopid John Black along on the Memphis trip? He's not only a fifth wheel, but is also flat tire.

Wow, this house is all decorated for Halloween! Are they having a costume party? If so, doodyhead John can play a ghoul. He'd be perfect for the part.
 
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