Salemites NEVER have to....

ktspirit said:
Take a shower unless it is for sex, lol.
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They also never worry about using birth control. How about a scene where Lani tells JJ that she forgot to take her pills.

ktspirit said:
Salemites never have to work for a diploma. Those are just handed out on the appropriate diploma days.
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True, but when was the last time a Salemite graduated. They generally drop out of dear old Salem U. and get top jobs.

Just Samantha said:
You never see them dealing with health insurance and outrageous co-pays.
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Why would they have to? University Hospital never charges for its services. Do the DiMeras and Kiriakises give it so much money it can afford to offer free medical care?

Poirot said:
NEVER have to take out the garbage, heck they don't even HAVE garbage cans. :)
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This must make it hard on the local raccoons. No wonder the Horton Cabin raccoon team dislikes Salemites so much. Not only do they intrude on their privacy, but they never leave tasty treats at the curb.
 
Salemites never having a problem moving. They pack a duffle bag, and are done. I am suspecting that all apt. in salem are furnished completely, as are the houses. NO movers.

Salemites also do not seem to have any form of Public transportation. not even a small mini bus.
 
Just Samantha said:
You never see them dealing with health insurance and outrageous co-pays.
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DrBakerFan said:
Why would they have to? University Hospital never charges for its services. Do the DiMeras and Kiriakises give it so much money it can afford to offer free medical care?
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My thoughts exactly! Anyone connected to the hospital (friends, family, etc.) gets free care from the Universe of Salem experts, lol. If someone is new in town, he/she better get in good with the University Hospital staff ASAP!
 
In Salem, residents never have to worry about needing a medical specialist. Either Victor pays for the bill or their one doctor is a cardiac/neural/internalist/orthopedic/geriatric-pediatric surgeon! They can do all surgeries, with no equipment or blood but their own in a non-sterile environment without a surgical anesthesiologist or nurse!!!
 
The older Salemites never seem to get an AARP magazine, do they? LOLOL

Salemites NEVER have a TV in any room, not even a bar, unless they need a news flash. And of late, that is provided by the ever present, never turned off, smart phones.
 
They never seem to read, think about, or have conversations about something they have read. They never have to discuss politics, ever. They are oblivious to the world beyond Salem in general.
 
Salemites never have to get ready. They all have such perfect hair and rosy cheeks in their faces as they wake up from bed!

Salemites never seem to have to excuse themselves to use the bathroom. My, those poor bladders.
 
Eras, It did amaze me that Marlena, while in Bayview, in restraints, yet, always had that perfectly combed hair, looked lovely.

Salemites never get a stain on their shirt or blouse. Burgers, pizza. soup, no one says, darn, got a spot of mustard, (is that because they don't ever actually EAT any food except olives, and fruit? LOL
 
Just Samantha said:
I think one of the few times we heard about Salemites having money problems was when Sami said they had something like $40 in the checking account and she had to get groceries. Plus Johnny and Allie needed new shoes and Sydney needed new pants or something, because they had outgrown their clothes. Meanwhile, EJ and Lucas were both wealthy men and probably paid hefty child support when Sami had custody of the kids. That was when Sami started applying for jobs and got hired by MadWorld.
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If my memory serves me correctly, back when Jack and Jennifer were first married there were discussions of money and how they were going to pay the bills and buy food too.
 
Poirot said:
The older Salemites never seem to get an AARP magazine, do they? LOLOL

Salemites NEVER have a TV in any room, not even a bar, unless they need a news flash. And of late, that is provided by the ever present, never turned off, smart phones.
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Good point about AARP magazine. It might make for a good scene if somebody dropped by the Pub and Roman was behind the bar perusing a copy. Speaking of the Pub, it's decor is hopelessly dated. By now, it should have an array of flat-screen TVs tuned to sports events.

Poirot said:
Salemites never get a stain on their shirt or blouse. Burgers, pizza. soup, no one says, darn, got a spot of mustard, (is that because they don't ever actually EAT any food except olives, and fruit? LOL
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The same is true of their furniture. Posters used to joke about the tainted DiMera Love Couch back in the days of the infamous hate boink, but in reality it was always pristine. So was Snow White the Town Square couch. Despite being in close proximity to coffee-cup-toting Salemites, it was always clean, sweet-smelling, and sanitary.

Finally, Salemites never seem to need qualifications for the jobs they hold. For example: people turn into doctors, lawyers, and police officers almost instantly; bumbling Billie was a total flop as head of security at Salem U., but was soon working for the ISA; Sami, whose only skills are scheming and screeching, has inexplicably been a senior business executive a few times; and finally, over at the K-mansion, Victor has passed around the leadership of Titan to the equally unqualified Philip, Brady, and Big Boy Sonny. (He'd have done better if he'd given the position to Pookie.)
 
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