Stefano’s Portrait Speaks

DrBakerFan

DrBakerFan

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To Megan: You want company shares? You should have thought about that before vanishing for decades.

To Kristen: You’re a disgrace to the family with your absurd schemes. Get out of my house!

To Gabi: No sister of our blockhead police commissioner should be anywhere near my company. Go back to GabiCheap.

To Zero: You’re no DiMera. You’re the spawn of Vivian Alamain.

To EJ: Don’t look so smug. I’ve got my eye on you. You’ve forgotten half of what I taught you.
 
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DrBakerFan said:
To Kristen: You’re a disgrace to the family with your absurd schemes. Get out of my house!
Click to expand...
Stefano calling someone's schemes absurd?

The man who dressed up as Elvis to inseminate Susan?

The man who kidnapped Roman and turned John Robicheaux into him?

The man who stole Roman's sperm and Kate's eggs to make Rex and Cassie?

The man who had an island built to look like Salem?

Stefano's portrait should be laughing at itself!
 
Stefano’s portrait responds:

Jason,

I’m surprised by your negative attitude. You sound like the Bradys and Rafael Hernandez. Are you saying that messing with the noxious Yo-Daddy’s family was a bad thing and that the existence of EJ, Cassie, and Rex is a mistake? As for my island, it was a far better place than the original badly-run, crime-ridden Salem.

Sternly,

Stefano DiMera
 
Stefano's portrait says:

Upgrade the security system, you morons! Anyone can get in here and does!

And while you're at it, install major security at the mausoleum. Maybe eye or hand recognition, something that can't be tampered with. Too much action in there. It should be SO good that even the Devil can't get in there!
 
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EJ responds: Father, even the best security system will be worthless if nobody remembers to activate it or even lock the door. And when was the last time Harold monitored the front door? He’s incorrigible. Instead, I propose that we put unflattering portraits of such odious specimens as Vivian, Megan, and Kristen on the front lawn. That should be enough to scare away any trespassers, burglars, assassins, busybodies, and the Salem cops. Good thinking, right?
 
I have rarely been so furious. That wretched Megan is actually plotting to murder a member of La Famiglia and has attacked another with a vase. I’m so angry that I just might step out of my portrait and use one of those samurai swords that are on the wall to separate her head from her shoulders. Being sent away to one of my secret islands is too good for her.
 
How dare that wretched Megan plot to kill Stefan, a leading member of La Famiglia. I will be sending firm orders that she and her cad son be sent to the DiMera equivalent of Alcatraz. They are unworthy of the DiMera name. By the way, don’t throw the murder of family member Benjy in my face. That was Andre’s doing as was keeping Lexie in the toxic Salem tunnels.
 
Oddio! My lunatic daughter Megan has now been shot by her own bumbling hitman, that pinhead Harris Michaels. Such a fool was unworthy of DiMera employment. If she dies, I will be sending a telepathic message to Elvis not to put her in the family mausoleum. Instead, let her be buried next to that other bungler, Arnold Finnegar, who fouled up his assignment to impersonate Rafael Hernandez.
 
Once again, Elvis is playing the fool. DiMeras don’t become district attorneys, they run circles around them. I didn’t spend good money so Elvis could get a prestigious Oxford law degree so he could waste his time prosecuting the likes of Dimitri and Leo.

Young Chadsworth is a family disgrace. Any virile DiMera man should be able to successfully woo Steven Johnson’s daughter. It’s not as if she’s some hard-to-get debutante from Salem high society.

Finally, I must give my old pawns, Steven and John, a round of applause for their efforts to save the gracious Maggie from that odious grifter, Konstantin. Believe me, if I was still in the mansion, a terrified Konstantin would be fleeing Salem in an effort to save his useless life.
 
Elvis is more of a disappointment than ever. DiMeras don’t become grubby district attorneys, a job fit for the likes of those fools Charles Woods and Aiden Jennings. And if he’s going to misuse his position, it should be to help the family’s less-than-legal businesses, not to persecute some high-school boy. It’s becoming clear that I never should have sired a son with the likes of Susan Banks.

Lastly, I am dissatisfied with both Steven Johnson and John Black. They are allowing that slimy grifter Konstantin to defy their demand that he leave town. Clearly, I did not teach them well enough. By now, the grubby Greek should no longer be walking the earth.
 
It was puzzling that Steve & John gave that slime ball ,Konstatin, a whole week to leave town. Usually it is 24 hours!!

one can tell there is no one overseeing the writing at this point. This is why so much inconsistency, or nonsensical story. Alarr was fired, Corday pays no attention, and NBC was slow on the uptake.
 
I take back what I said about Elvis being a total disgrace to the family. Yes, being a district attorney is scraping bottom, but at least Elvis has half a brain. Stefan, in contrast, is a complete disaster. He’s actually afraid of that ridiculous Clyde and worse, he has now shot a cop on Clyde’s orders. And to make things worse, he did so while wearing a hoodie like a common hoodlum. I can assure you that Santo, Andre, and our dear Bart are spinning in their graves. What a mistake my liaison with Vivian was. I’d have been better off having a second child with Susan Banks.

Finally, I must add that Rafael Hernandez hasn’t gotten any smarter with time. Can you believe that he actually suspects that fine young man, Xander, shot Detective Harris? This is such an obvious Clyde frame-up that even a dullard like Brady Black could sort things out.
 
Elvis, you fool. Do la famiglia a big favor by calling Rafael Hernandez and requesting that Stefan be arrested for his moronic attempt on the life of Dectective Harris Michaels. This son of Vivian has been nothing but a blight on the family since he arrived in Salem. What kind of DiMera takes orders from Clyde Weston or gets the hots for a schizophrenic’s alter? Turning him in also makes financial sense. Sending family problems to secret islands costs money. Let the state pay for this loser’s upkeep.
 
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