soapkitty
Well-Known Member
A handsome stranger called my name in the crowded beach pavilion where children drank lemonade and dragon slayers played chess with a scaly cousin. I turned towards the door, and there stood Queen Elizabeth! She was wearing a bejeweled crown with blue sapphires and diamonds atop her head. Her dress was made of leather.
In her hands was a gun. She smiled and pulled the trigger. Goodbye EJ DiMera! Her aim was deadly accurate. But the watergun only was a decoy. From her handbag she pulled a used crumpled tissue which she used to dab at her smudged lipstick. Thinking fast, she hid his body behind the lifeguard with the great smile. Then she asked for sunscreen and a cigarette. Flicking his Bic, James Bond smirked, offering a martini and his barstool. "Your Majesty, I need a favor. Will you please help me find the nearest bathroom? The Queen points to her limo driver and says, "ask Jeffrey, he has a knack, plus a GPS. Let's gas up and..." Bond interrupts.. "take off for the nearest tree, a Maple, preferably, so I can kiss you passionately." Queen Elizabeth blushes but puckers up and her wrinkles seem to disappear. Her eyes are twinkling as she takes his arm, pulls him close, soap stares him and says "James, does this dress make me look young, sexy, hip? James Bond replied: "You look absolutely smashing, my dear!".
Suddenly Prince Philip appeared from nowhere! "Won't you introduce this handsome gent and his lovely entourage? I say "Bond? I thought your son was to join us?" "Son? I don't have a son. That is my boy toy Mark, who always arrives after dark. Would you like to meet him and check him out?" "No" replied the Prince, I want to know why the limo isn't carrying Paris Hilton? And where is Jennifer Love Hewitt?
Bond smirks, and reminds Prince Charming this is a beach, not a brothel, and he makes a bet he'll get sunburned on his naked head unless he wears his crown covered over with old warring roses. On his big ears he sprays whipped cream because when the Queen sees this she will ultimately lose her cool and scream bloody murder. Bond covers her eyes and ears, stopping her struggles, and whisks her away to Oz. In that land adjacent to Salem, by cascading waterfalls, lies a small leprechaun with green eggs and ham. He says, "SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS!" Even though the meal is burnt!
In her hands was a gun. She smiled and pulled the trigger. Goodbye EJ DiMera! Her aim was deadly accurate. But the watergun only was a decoy. From her handbag she pulled a used crumpled tissue which she used to dab at her smudged lipstick. Thinking fast, she hid his body behind the lifeguard with the great smile. Then she asked for sunscreen and a cigarette. Flicking his Bic, James Bond smirked, offering a martini and his barstool. "Your Majesty, I need a favor. Will you please help me find the nearest bathroom? The Queen points to her limo driver and says, "ask Jeffrey, he has a knack, plus a GPS. Let's gas up and..." Bond interrupts.. "take off for the nearest tree, a Maple, preferably, so I can kiss you passionately." Queen Elizabeth blushes but puckers up and her wrinkles seem to disappear. Her eyes are twinkling as she takes his arm, pulls him close, soap stares him and says "James, does this dress make me look young, sexy, hip? James Bond replied: "You look absolutely smashing, my dear!".
Suddenly Prince Philip appeared from nowhere! "Won't you introduce this handsome gent and his lovely entourage? I say "Bond? I thought your son was to join us?" "Son? I don't have a son. That is my boy toy Mark, who always arrives after dark. Would you like to meet him and check him out?" "No" replied the Prince, I want to know why the limo isn't carrying Paris Hilton? And where is Jennifer Love Hewitt?
Bond smirks, and reminds Prince Charming this is a beach, not a brothel, and he makes a bet he'll get sunburned on his naked head unless he wears his crown covered over with old warring roses. On his big ears he sprays whipped cream because when the Queen sees this she will ultimately lose her cool and scream bloody murder. Bond covers her eyes and ears, stopping her struggles, and whisks her away to Oz. In that land adjacent to Salem, by cascading waterfalls, lies a small leprechaun with green eggs and ham. He says, "SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS!" Even though the meal is burnt!
