A Very Salem Christmas - Part 3
Cut to exterior snowy scenes as a new day has dawned. We zoom in to a very tall office building where Paulina is continuing to throw little silver balls at Leo. She's mad because they found out about a loophole that could screw up her plans. An old law allows any business owner who's been there for at least a year to have an opportunity to buy out their lease, but they have to do it by midnight. Back to the couch with Will and Sonny, Sonny likes the midnight deadline because it's very on brand for Christmas movies.
Sami convenes all the parties at the Brady Pub to discuss how they're going to get the money to buy their leases. John has been able to wrangle up a good bit of money, but it's not enough to save everybody's business. Kristen suggests they select a few businesses to save, but Marlena says they're all in this together. Allie asks if Chanel can get them an extension, but her bestie is doubtful. Sami has an idea.
Suddenly, we cut to a banner that says, "Christmas Eve Talent Show Fundraiser" with a big, sparkly stage in the Town Square. EJ and Sami talk about how clever she is. EJ would donate money, but the DiMera assets are frozen because of legal trouble.
Brady arrives at Gabi Chic to pick up his costume for the show, and he's dressed like a 1970s pimp.
He told the woman he loved how he felt, and it didn't work out. She thinks maybe they could hang out, but he wants to keep things professional between them. They work for rival companies (first reference to Brady having a job). Gabi feels like an idiot, and Nick comforts her.
At the event, Allie and Chanel leave the stage with guitars as if they were just singing. (No Johnny Rock Star?) Master of Ceremonies Sami gives them a round applause and says it's an interesting choice to cover the Indigo Girls (which is a hilarious joke and reference to the lesbian love story brewing between them). The tote board shows they are only half way to their goal and running out of time. Paulina cackles and taunt them until Leo cuts her off. There's one more act. He excitedly confesses he's the one who tipped everyone off about the loophole. "How could you stab me in the back, Mary, after everything I've done for you?" Leo starts to correct her, but stops. He's fine with that as long as it's M-E-R-R-Y. He jumps on stage and introduces the incomparable We Three Queens Sonny Delight, Wilhelmina Shakespeare...
Then, the story cuts back to the Phoenix apartment. Sonny doesn't like the direction the story. He grabs the laptop and types. The, we get Amanda Bottoms instead of Wilhelmina, but it's still Will in drag along with Sonny in drag. The last of the trio is Bulina China Shop, which is Chad in his drag persona. The three friends are dressed in short, faux fur edged Mrs. Santa tank dresses a la
Mean Girl's school assembly. They start dancing to a jazzy version of Deck the Halls. Chad flips up his skirt. They blow the audience kisses. The tote board lights up almost to where they need it.
Chad, still in drag, says you checked out the girls. Now it's time to check out the boys. It's time for Salem's sexy Santas. Brady, EJ, Xander, Tripp, Johnny, and Nick are all dressed as Santa with chairs on stage for a sexy Magic Mike routine. The rip off their beards and start dancing, humping the chairs (there's no other way to put it). Then, they jump up on the chairs and tear off the top of their Santa outfits for some shirtless dancing.
Off to the side, Allie asks Gabi why she and Nick aren't a couple. Gabi insists she doesn't see him that way. She has flashbacks to their times together and realizes she has feelings for him, as she looks at him shirtless on the stage. Chanel looks at the stage and says she realizes that she and Johnny are a better match. Allie agrees.
Back to the sexy, wildly inappropriate dance to a club version of "Come All Ye Faithful." The boys rip off their Santa pants, revealing Christmas boxers. Some of the boys are better stage-writhers than others. Everyone waits in bated breath to see if that final hip thrusting performance got them over the limit. And it did! Chanel jumps up on stage grabs Johnny and gives him a kiss. Tripp is upset until Allie grabs him and does the same. Marlena pats John on the back. Doesn't he want to go find Kristen? To be honest, he wonders if she even cares.
Kristen is at home in bed, drinking champagne and eating popcorn and remembering Brady's little display. She's watching
Love Actually and finally sees that that is the best part of the movie.
Back in the square, Gabi runs up to Brady and Nick and says, "You were amazing," and then she grabs and kisses Nick. (It's very weird seeing Nick and Gabi kissing.) Brady smiles and leaves. Gabi and Nick canoodle and agree to go watch
Die Hard. EJ gushes with Sami over her success. They hug. Nicole looks peeved. John doesn't think the night could be any more perfect and then it starts to snow. He looks up and says doesn't place have a roof? Marlena believes it's a Christmas miracle.
Later, Sami is at the pub, talking to a picture of Roman about how she managed to wire the money and save the square. Nicole storms in. How dare Sami ogle EJ? And while she's at it, Sami also needs to stay away from her daughter. EJ storms in, "Except she isn't your daughter. Is she Nicole?" (duh duh duhhhhh) He just had a talk with that Neanderthal Rafe who uncovered a grave injustice. EJ and Sami's child didn't die. Their child is Sydney. Nicole switched the babies! Sami slaps Nicole. "Sydney is my daughter." She demands Nicole say it. Nicole says no, and Sami slaps her again. Sami is infuriated. "Sydney is mine and I'm going to make you say it." Nicole confesses Sydney is hers. EJ has rage face.
Meanwhile, the partner swap couples talk about how awkward it is that they've swapped partners, but they decide it's better this way. Tripp says now they're with who they're supposed to be with. Allie says uh-huh while she and Chanel exchange knowing looks.
Leo greets Xander who has to put his glasses back on to see who he is. He's still shirtless in his boxer shorts with his Santa coat open. Xander asks Leo what made him change his tune and help the town. Leo says it was his big speech. Xander takes his glasses off and gives Leo a kiss on the cheek. Leo wonders who helped Paulina since Xander says it wasn't him.
Paulina is in the park, railing about her plans being foiled. Kristen walks up and says she did the best she could. She was tired of running that stupid Inn. Paulina leaves, and later, Brady runs into Kristen. She tells him that she loves him. (Who in the name of all that is holy wants these two people together even in a weird fantasy?) He grabs her and kisses her. John walks by and sees them.
Later, Chanel shows up at Paulina's office to invite her to a Christmas brunch. They're calling it a very swappy Christmas. Paulina is a Grinch, but she's still Chanel's mother, and she believes her mom has a heart in there somewhere.
Sydney is in her room waiting for Santa. EJ says Santa is not here yet but he has a gift. Sami walks in and tells Sydney her Christmas wish has come true. She's her mom. They hug. Sami gets to tuck Sydney into bed. EJ tells Sami they were meant to be a family. He kisses her.
Nicole is sitting in the snow outside the pub crushed by the revelations. She looks up into the snow and prays for forgiveness then takes it back because she says after what she's done, she doesn't deserve forgiveness. (That's very on brand for Nicole.) The homeless man offers her a Kleenex that cannot possibly be clean. Everyone deserves forgiveness, he says. Zoom in underneath all the clothing and the scarf around his face. It's Eric.
Marlena arrives at the Inn where John huddles by the fire. She asks if everything is okay. He announces he and Kristen are getting divorced. She says she's so sorry, and he says, "Thank you, Doc." He hasn't called her that in years. They sit together. The clock chimes for midnight, and they gaze at each other. He says, "Merry Christmas, Doc." "Merry Christmas, John." She leans her head on his shoulder, and they stare at the fire.
Back to Phoenix, Will reads the last lines of the happily ever after in the movie. They send the script off just in time. Sonny is glad they got to spend Christmas in Salem, even if they weren't there. They promised to visit as the clock strikes midnight. They say, "Merry Christmas." Sonny calls Will "Pookie," and they laugh and kiss. Then, the camera zooms in on an ornament that has an hourglass. (THE END)