Salem is great place to live, because

Poirot

Poirot

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The money tree! Grows right there in the town square, constantly blooms.

Citizens never have to go to work, just have a handy cell phone, & a bench or table in the Horton town square. Oh, yeah, laptop, too.

Anyone gets a high paying corporate job despite not having any college, or sometimes, even a high school diploma

Medical & legal careers are all accelerated programs, whereby one finishes in a year.

Salem water has magical qualities....keeps babies tiny as newborn for months, then shoots them up to school age, and then makes them invisible for a couple years, & bingo.....full grown adult!
 
You can sleep with all generations of a family, father, son, grandson and no one cares.

You never need to go grocery shopping, worry about car insurance or gas for you car

You never have any bills of any sort, electric, gas.

You don't own a television unless da plot calls for it.

Hotel rooms are huge

Apartments/condos/houses expand or contract depending on how many people live there. There is always hot water for showering either alone or with a partner

Hospitals don't have scratchy boring white sheets

The park stays green and leafy all year round
 
Members of the local in-crowd can often get away with all sorts of serious crimes. And if they do have the misfortune of actually going to prison, they are usually released in a remarkably short time.

No cars are necessary. Anyplace in town is seconds or, at most, minutes away from any other place.

There are no nasty flies, mosquitoes, wasps, gnats, roaches, etc. anywhere in town.

No dog will ever leave a "gift" on your lawn. The last dog in Salem was Pookie, but sadly, he's been gone for years.

Students at Salem High and dear old Salem U. never have to go to class, take tests, or write term papers.

Although Salem is not supposed to be a large city, it has direct flights to almost any location in the world.

For those who want to hide out for whatever reason, there are always plenty of empty cabins and warehouses.

Surprise pregnancies do occur, but nobody gets any of the most common STDs.
 
DrBakerFan said:
No cars are necessary.
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This is actually one of the drawbacks to life in Salem - if you need a car, it is usually to kill someone.

Another highlight of life in Salem is that one can disguise oneself with a hat and sunglasses, and waltz through heavily populated areas without suspicion.
 
Yep, someone wearing sunglasses AT NIGHT arouses no suspicion whatsoever.

And whatever illness or injury anyone may suffer, Salem Hospital's ONE doctor can do it all, is always there...Dr. Kayla. transplants, limb removal, brain surgery, stitches, even a bandaid for a cut finger...nothing too big or small.
 
Downfalls--

No one is allowed to be happy

No wedding without "excitement"

Secrets never stay secrets

All new characters end up shady or are another spawn on Stefano, Vivian, Kate, etc.

No sex can still cause pregnancies

No reason to get an education because everyone is related to a Titan or Kirikas owner and therefore guarantee the CEO position (but only in an "off and on" way because it depends how many others are out there. You have to take turns unless your dead

You are born with an innate ability to be resurrected, mainly by Dr. Rolf

And all the other things that have been said.
 
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On the subject of downsides, one big minus about Salem comes with a silver lining. Comas are remarkably common, but the upside is that the victims always recover (usually rather quickly) and without any aftereffects, Other medical pluses to living in Salem is that nobody ever catches the common cold, the seasonal flu, or picks up poison ivy. And nobody has any kind of allergy. (Imagine Xander saying, "I love Mags, but her lemon bars make me break out in hives.")
 
robinsnest said:
Another upside for guys, you can have many many children and they all show up after they become of age so no child support payments.
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Good point. This probably explains why men in Salem are always so enthused about new babies -- they don't have to pay for their care. If they did, Salem would probably as full of paternity-deniers and deadbeat dads as the outside world.
 
I remember Victor making a snarky remark, that it's good Sonny is gay, or she'd have slept with him, too. Don't remember who she was, but comment really fits Salem.
 
All utilities are free, plus TVs are magically hidden from rooms until there is an important newsflash, wherein they come out of hiding!

Most residents opt to live in a motel room year round. Salem Inn benefits greatly from this, as it would seem, no one needs anything more than a bed & a bathroom to survive in Salem. Probably explains why no one can cook. Plus Salem Inn evidently provides laundry & dry cleaning services as well.

Then we have the mansions, which are magically cleaned & meals cooked by robots, since no one sees servants.

No one has to grocery shop, as either all meals are eaten away from home, or all Salemites are on a constant drastic diet.
 
If you are a criminal or suffer from mental illness, Salem is a great place to live.

The police department is so incompetent that it's highly unlikely that you'll ever be caught.

The town is full of potential hideouts that none of the locals will ever find without being tipped off.

If you do get caught, there will always be an attorney ready to defend you without charge.

If you do end up in prison, you probably will be able to have unlimited, unsupervised visits from friends and family

Members of the in-crowd who do get prison sentences will usually get them quickly reduced to time served.

Those who are in with the out-crowd who go to jail may find it remarkably easy to escape. Some convicts practically commute from Salem to prison and back.

Those suffering from mental problems can usually get free consultations with Dr. Evans.

Persons unlucky enough to be placed in Bayview or some other mental facility will either escape or be declared sane in a very short time.
 
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You can confess your sins and get absolution at the Pub.

Disastrous Town Square weddings provide free entertainment.

All the raccoons live on Smith Island, which means they'll never raid your garbage cans.

You can own a business without actually having to run it.

The cops don't hassle ordinary citizens. In fact, they also rarely bother career criminals.

Nobody ever seems to get a bill from the local hospital.

You can be mayor without ever having to do any work.

Nobody pays taxes so April 15 is just another day.
 
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