Salem Spectator Society Page, Part 3
- Thread starter DrBakerFan
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Let's not forget his first missus, the current Mrs. "Eric-is-my-true-love" Hernandez.
JasonDíSpeech
Well-Known Member
CORRECTION:
A previous article reported that this was the second marriage for Mr Xander Kiriakis. We unintentionally omitted that he was once, under apparent duress for both parties, married to the true lifelong love ofEric Brady Daniel Jonas EJ DiMera Rafe Hernandez, Ms Nicole Walker.
A previous article reported that this was the second marriage for Mr Xander Kiriakis. We unintentionally omitted that he was once, under apparent duress for both parties, married to the true lifelong love of
DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
SALEM NOTABLES REMARRY IN SURPRISE BEDSIDE CEREMONY
Infamous schemer and veteran backstabber Katherine Elizabeth Roberts married former police commissioner and current burger flipper Roman Augustus Brady in her hospital room today. Performing the ceremony was defrocked ex-priest, the perpetually gloomy Mr. Eric Brady and witnessed by the dull, but dedicated, Dr. Rex "Rexy" Brady. In addition to Ms. Roberts, Mr. Brady has been married to Anna Fredericks DiMera and Dr. Marlena Evans. Ms Roberts is also no slouch in the marriage department. Besides Mr. Brady, her former husbands include: the late drug addict/musician Mr. Curtis Reed, grouchy Titan mogul Mr. Victor Kiriakis, the late criminal genius Mr. Stefano DiMera, and his eccentric son, the now deceased Mr. Andre DiMera. The happy couple's future plans depend on her recovery from the mysterious Orpheus disease with which she is currently afflicted. If, as expected, Ms. Roberts miraculously recovers, she and her husband expect to reside above the Brady Pub and provide hungry Salemites with such tasty favorites as Brady Burgers, clam chowder, choco puffs, and garbage can nachos.
Infamous schemer and veteran backstabber Katherine Elizabeth Roberts married former police commissioner and current burger flipper Roman Augustus Brady in her hospital room today. Performing the ceremony was defrocked ex-priest, the perpetually gloomy Mr. Eric Brady and witnessed by the dull, but dedicated, Dr. Rex "Rexy" Brady. In addition to Ms. Roberts, Mr. Brady has been married to Anna Fredericks DiMera and Dr. Marlena Evans. Ms Roberts is also no slouch in the marriage department. Besides Mr. Brady, her former husbands include: the late drug addict/musician Mr. Curtis Reed, grouchy Titan mogul Mr. Victor Kiriakis, the late criminal genius Mr. Stefano DiMera, and his eccentric son, the now deceased Mr. Andre DiMera. The happy couple's future plans depend on her recovery from the mysterious Orpheus disease with which she is currently afflicted. If, as expected, Ms. Roberts miraculously recovers, she and her husband expect to reside above the Brady Pub and provide hungry Salemites with such tasty favorites as Brady Burgers, clam chowder, choco puffs, and garbage can nachos.
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Reply from Sami Brady:
DrBakerFan
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MARRIAGE IMPLODES MOMENTS AFTER THE I DOS
The marriage between two of Salem’s leading corporate schemers, Mr. Li Shin and Ms. Gabriella Hernandez, crashed and burned moments after the wedding ceremony when it was revealed to all that the groom had conspired to brainwash Ms Hernandez’s ex-husband, the recently resurrected Mr. Stefan O. DiMera, so he would lose all loving feelings for her. Initially things went quite well. The affair was held at a real venue, not bombed-damaged St. Luke’s, a living room, or the Town Square. No bomb went off, no intruders loudly disrupted the proceedings, and nobody was kidnapped. Guests included Salem’s odd couple Mr. and Ms. Brady Black; ex-spouses Mr. EJ DiMera and Ms. Nicole Walker; and Police Commissioner Rafael Hernandez and Detective Jada Hunter, who given recent events, would have been well advised to bring police bomb-sniffer dogs with them. Given the circumstances, neither the bride nor the groom have announced any post wedding plans.
The marriage between two of Salem’s leading corporate schemers, Mr. Li Shin and Ms. Gabriella Hernandez, crashed and burned moments after the wedding ceremony when it was revealed to all that the groom had conspired to brainwash Ms Hernandez’s ex-husband, the recently resurrected Mr. Stefan O. DiMera, so he would lose all loving feelings for her. Initially things went quite well. The affair was held at a real venue, not bombed-damaged St. Luke’s, a living room, or the Town Square. No bomb went off, no intruders loudly disrupted the proceedings, and nobody was kidnapped. Guests included Salem’s odd couple Mr. and Ms. Brady Black; ex-spouses Mr. EJ DiMera and Ms. Nicole Walker; and Police Commissioner Rafael Hernandez and Detective Jada Hunter, who given recent events, would have been well advised to bring police bomb-sniffer dogs with them. Given the circumstances, neither the bride nor the groom have announced any post wedding plans.
DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
DR. SARAH HORTON DIVORCES HUSBAND TWICE!
Having divorced her husband, Xander Kiriakis, because of his alleged role of Mr Clown in the Susan Banks-Bonnie Lockhart kidnapping and myriad other faults, Dr. Sarah Horton was afforded the opportunity to divorce him a second time because of a clerical error at Salem family court. Mr. Kiriakis had hoped that time might have healed old wounds, but the hard hearted Dr. Horton remained determined to be rid of him. It had been rumored that Dr. Horton might return to her insufferably dull ex-husband, Dr. Rex Brady, but he too has now been firmly rejected. Once the dust settles, informed Salemites are certain that the manly Mr. Kiriakis’s prospects in the local marriage market far exceed those of his ex-wife, who is well known at University Hospital for her total lack of a bedside manner. In fact, local hotties are reportedly already visiting clubs, the Town Square, and the Brady Pub, hoping to meet Mr. Kiriakis and eventually become his latest spouse.
Having divorced her husband, Xander Kiriakis, because of his alleged role of Mr Clown in the Susan Banks-Bonnie Lockhart kidnapping and myriad other faults, Dr. Sarah Horton was afforded the opportunity to divorce him a second time because of a clerical error at Salem family court. Mr. Kiriakis had hoped that time might have healed old wounds, but the hard hearted Dr. Horton remained determined to be rid of him. It had been rumored that Dr. Horton might return to her insufferably dull ex-husband, Dr. Rex Brady, but he too has now been firmly rejected. Once the dust settles, informed Salemites are certain that the manly Mr. Kiriakis’s prospects in the local marriage market far exceed those of his ex-wife, who is well known at University Hospital for her total lack of a bedside manner. In fact, local hotties are reportedly already visiting clubs, the Town Square, and the Brady Pub, hoping to meet Mr. Kiriakis and eventually become his latest spouse.
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DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
DIMERA BUSINESS DINNER ENDS BADLY FOR EJ
A formal dinner at the posh DiMera mansion in honor of board chairman Wei Shin did not go well for ambitious co-CEO EJ DiMera. Reportedly anxious to outshine his co-CEO, the resurrected Stefan O. DiMera, Mr. DiMera stumbled badly, slurring his words, sweating profusely, and making angry outbursts. Some observers are speculating that this clears the way for Stefan O. to take the top job. Others think Wei Shin will balk at putting a former dead person in charge and will look for outside executive talent, such as Titan Casanova Alex Kiriakis who has just been sidelined by new CEO Maggie Kiriakis, a well-known Xander admirer.
A formal dinner at the posh DiMera mansion in honor of board chairman Wei Shin did not go well for ambitious co-CEO EJ DiMera. Reportedly anxious to outshine his co-CEO, the resurrected Stefan O. DiMera, Mr. DiMera stumbled badly, slurring his words, sweating profusely, and making angry outbursts. Some observers are speculating that this clears the way for Stefan O. to take the top job. Others think Wei Shin will balk at putting a former dead person in charge and will look for outside executive talent, such as Titan Casanova Alex Kiriakis who has just been sidelined by new CEO Maggie Kiriakis, a well-known Xander admirer.
DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
DIMERA GALA ENDS IN BLOODSHED
A DiMera family gala hosted by Ms. Megan Hathaway DiMera collapsed in chaos today as the odious Ms. DiMera was shot by her bumbling, alleged hit man, washed-up ISA agent Mr. Harris Michaels. According to informed sources the allegedly weak-minded Mr. Harris had been hypnotized and hired by Ms. DiMera to kill Mr. Stefan O. DiMera, clearing the way for her to gain control of DiMera Enterprises. The plot went awry when intrepid fashionista Ms. Gabriella Hernandez attempted to save her endangered fiancé by leaping on Mr. Harris’s back, causing his gunshot to strike his employer instead of his intended target. At that point, the cavalry in the form of Commissioner Rafael Hernandez arrived to arrest Mr. Harris. Meanwhile, outside the party venue, another plotter, Shin family biggest loser, Li, was also taken into custody. With little doubt about the facts, the only question seems to be which of the plotters will go to Bayview and which will go to prison.
A DiMera family gala hosted by Ms. Megan Hathaway DiMera collapsed in chaos today as the odious Ms. DiMera was shot by her bumbling, alleged hit man, washed-up ISA agent Mr. Harris Michaels. According to informed sources the allegedly weak-minded Mr. Harris had been hypnotized and hired by Ms. DiMera to kill Mr. Stefan O. DiMera, clearing the way for her to gain control of DiMera Enterprises. The plot went awry when intrepid fashionista Ms. Gabriella Hernandez attempted to save her endangered fiancé by leaping on Mr. Harris’s back, causing his gunshot to strike his employer instead of his intended target. At that point, the cavalry in the form of Commissioner Rafael Hernandez arrived to arrest Mr. Harris. Meanwhile, outside the party venue, another plotter, Shin family biggest loser, Li, was also taken into custody. With little doubt about the facts, the only question seems to be which of the plotters will go to Bayview and which will go to prison.
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DrBakerFan
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BAR ROOM WEDDING FOR LOCAL DOC
New mother Dr. Sarah Horton of University Hospital was wed today in a simple, uninterrupted ceremony to her former husband, the undynamic Dr. Rex Brady of Chicago. The venue for the happy event was the storied Brady Pub. Officiating was Mr. Philip Kiriakis aka Shaggy Phil who sported a scruffy beard and wore a black leather jacket for the ceremony. Guests included the groom’s father, Mr. Roman Brady, the great chowder artiste and his spouse, Ms. Kate Roberts, the professional fish chopper. The newlyweds have announced no plans, but presumably will be dealing with Mr. Xander Kiriakis who has just learned that he is the real father of the bride’s baby daughter.
New mother Dr. Sarah Horton of University Hospital was wed today in a simple, uninterrupted ceremony to her former husband, the undynamic Dr. Rex Brady of Chicago. The venue for the happy event was the storied Brady Pub. Officiating was Mr. Philip Kiriakis aka Shaggy Phil who sported a scruffy beard and wore a black leather jacket for the ceremony. Guests included the groom’s father, Mr. Roman Brady, the great chowder artiste and his spouse, Ms. Kate Roberts, the professional fish chopper. The newlyweds have announced no plans, but presumably will be dealing with Mr. Xander Kiriakis who has just learned that he is the real father of the bride’s baby daughter.
DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
LOW BUDGET WEDDING REUNITES EJ AND NICOLE
Mr. EJ DiMera and Ms. Nicole Walker remarried today in a simple ceremony at the family mansion. Presiding was the instantly ordained Mr. Chad DiMera. The ceremony was notable for its lack of flowers, refreshments, and alcoholic libations. Others present were Ms. Holly Jonas as maid-of-honor and Mr. Johnny DiMera who performed well as best man. The role of unwanted intruders was played by Mr. Stefan O. DiMera and infamous schemer Ms. Gabriella Hernandez, who rudely announced after the ceremony that EJ was out as CEO of the family company. The new couple had announced no future plans, but will now presumably will be working overtime to teach the unholy Stefan-Gabi combination some badly needed manners.
Mr. EJ DiMera and Ms. Nicole Walker remarried today in a simple ceremony at the family mansion. Presiding was the instantly ordained Mr. Chad DiMera. The ceremony was notable for its lack of flowers, refreshments, and alcoholic libations. Others present were Ms. Holly Jonas as maid-of-honor and Mr. Johnny DiMera who performed well as best man. The role of unwanted intruders was played by Mr. Stefan O. DiMera and infamous schemer Ms. Gabriella Hernandez, who rudely announced after the ceremony that EJ was out as CEO of the family company. The new couple had announced no future plans, but will now presumably will be working overtime to teach the unholy Stefan-Gabi combination some badly needed manners.
DrBakerFan
Well-Known Member
QUICKIE CEREMONY UNITES SHYSTER LAWYER AND FAILED PRIEST
The posh townhouse of Mr John Black and Dr. Marlena Evans was the scene of last week’s impromptu wedding of sometime priest Mr. Eric Brady and notorious shyster Ms. Sloan Peterson. Dr. Evans provided a badly-needed touch of class to the event with her refined, professional performance as officiant. Also present were Salem’s chowder king Mr. Roman Brady, and Mr. Brady Black who took a break from his messy personal life to be there. Informed sources say that Ms. Peterson will continue with her law practice, while Mr. Brady will be sitting in the back of the courtroom saying the rosary and hoping that the Lord will help his new wife win a few cases.
The posh townhouse of Mr John Black and Dr. Marlena Evans was the scene of last week’s impromptu wedding of sometime priest Mr. Eric Brady and notorious shyster Ms. Sloan Peterson. Dr. Evans provided a badly-needed touch of class to the event with her refined, professional performance as officiant. Also present were Salem’s chowder king Mr. Roman Brady, and Mr. Brady Black who took a break from his messy personal life to be there. Informed sources say that Ms. Peterson will continue with her law practice, while Mr. Brady will be sitting in the back of the courtroom saying the rosary and hoping that the Lord will help his new wife win a few cases.
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[on the Salem Spectator social media page]
Reply from Samantha Brady: OMG, I can't believe someone was stoopid enough to marry my bad twin. Daddy says she didn't even like Grandma's clam chowder, which shows just how stoopid she is. Just because she's a lawyer doesn't mean she's smart. Just look at my sisters, Carrie and Belle. Mark my words, this is going to end in divorce in a New York minute. My sourpuss twin should just stick to mopping the floors at the pub, or go back to Africa where they apparently like him. It's a shame he can't be as amazing as me, Salem's greatest mother ever.
Reply from Samantha Brady: OMG, I can't believe someone was stoopid enough to marry my bad twin. Daddy says she didn't even like Grandma's clam chowder, which shows just how stoopid she is. Just because she's a lawyer doesn't mean she's smart. Just look at my sisters, Carrie and Belle. Mark my words, this is going to end in divorce in a New York minute. My sourpuss twin should just stick to mopping the floors at the pub, or go back to Africa where they apparently like him. It's a shame he can't be as amazing as me, Salem's greatest mother ever.
JasonDíSpeech
Well-Known Member
[on the Salem Spectator social media page]
Reply from Roman: What da hell, Sami? Sloan told me she'd give ma's chowder another try, so give her a break! And you know how competitive you and Eric have always been - he's just trying to catch up to your number of divorces, and your mother and I support him.
Reply from Roman: What da hell, Sami? Sloan told me she'd give ma's chowder another try, so give her a break! And you know how competitive you and Eric have always been - he's just trying to catch up to your number of divorces, and your mother and I support him.