Facebook posts and Tweets from Salemites, Part 18

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Facebook post from Sami: How dare my son call me a nasty name and say I'm just as bad as Dirty Abby for having sex with EJ on the couch at the DiMansion when I was married to Rafe?? Rotten kid! I HATE HIM!! Besides, I'm not nearly as bad as Dirty Abby.... or my stupid mother and that doody-head John Black for having sex on the conference room table at Titan and ruining my life. This is all their fault!

Reply from EJ: Yes... that's right... this is all Marlena and John's fault.... not mine or Abigail's.

Reply from Sami: SHUT UP! I HATE YOU, TOO!!

Reply from ComaJohn: Give it a break, Sami!!! Everything that's ever gone wrong in your life is NOT your mother's or my fault! This one is squarely on EJ's and Abby's shoulders (sorry, Abby..... but you're on your own with this one....good luck, you're going to need it).
 
Facebook post from Theresa to Kimberly: Mom, if someone happened to get on Victor Kiriakis' bad side, what would be your advice for them?? Not that I am or anything, I was just curious.

Reply from Kimberly: I'd advise them to go see your Cousin Will's father-in-law, Justin.....and have him prepare their will.

Reply from Theresa: :eek:
 
Facebook post from Theresa to Sami: Hey, cuz, any chance you're dumping your rich husband soon? I need a new one.

Reply from Sami: Sure, Little Jeannie....but he won't be rich when I'm done with him.

Reply from Theresa: Never mind!
 
Tweet from Theresa: Bad news, my gravy train with Brady has hit a wall, and EJ will soon be broke, so I was just thinking -- John Black is rich -- can a man in a coma enter into marriage?

Reply from Aiden: No.

Reply from Theresa. Too bad. Perhaps there's a chance I could pry rich and grouchy old Victor away from his busybody wife. I could show him such a good time that he'd have a heart attack. Ha, ha!

Reply from Maggie: You brazen hussy. You stay away from my Victor!!!

Reply from Theresa. What an old bat. By any chance is Howard Hughes still alive?

Reply from Eve: You dolt. Howard Hughes has been dead since 1976!

Reply from Therea: Whoops, I was born too late. Anyway, any rich guys out there who are looking for a hot girl should contact me, Theresa Donovan in Salem.

Reply from Stefano: Theresa, you're in luck. Since Cecily is gone, I'm looking for a new companion who's one-quarter my age. P.S., I'll soon crrrrush Samantha and Katarina and regain full control of the DiMera empire.

Reply from Theresa: Ick! Yuck! I may be desperate, but I'm not that desperate.
 
Kimberly: Jean....um Theresa I wanted to tell you this in person but you probably wouldn't let me get a word in but you wanted to know about Victor well I once thought your brother was Victor's son. I'ts a long story but I'll tell you about it.

Theresa: What? EWWWW MOM!!! Victor was your "John" ?

Kimberly : No , Sweetie he... (messaged unread deleted by Theresa)

Kimberly: Theresa ?

Kimberly: Theresa ! Answer me

Theresa: la la la la la la la la l I'm not listening or reading. I'm blocking you.... you're stupid
 
Facebook post from Sami: Hey, every business owner in Salem, just so you know, I'm going to pull every penny of support DiMera Enterprises might give you if you even dare to hire Abigail Deveraux. Abby is a dirty girl who doesn't deserve to work anywhere because she slept with my fiance. Heck, she even pretended she slept with my own sainted sister's husband. What kind of hussy does that??

Reply from Carrie: Yeah... you tell 'em, sis!

Reply from Roman: Dammit Sami.... Now you even have Carrie agreeing with you?? What has this world come to???

Reply from Will: Sigh..............
 
Facebook Post from Abigail Johanna Deveraux: Losing my job at the hospital was a blessing in disguise. I'm going to purchase The Spectator and make my parents proud!

Reply from Jennifer Rose Horton: :clap:

Reply from Lucas Horton: :) That's my niece!

Reply from Mike Horton: :)

Reply from JJ Deveraux: Way to go Sis!

Reply from Kayla Brady: Cream rises to the top!

Reply from William Horton: Are you looking for bloggers for the online edition?

Reply from EJ Dimera: Like I said, you are a smart and beautiful woman. I'm proud of you. Are you looking for investors?

Reply from Maggie Kiriakis: Can I write an advice column for Salemites?

Reply from Samantha Brady Reed Walker Roberts-Horton Dimera Hernandez Dimera: :eek: I HATE YOU!!!

Abigail Johanna Deveraux blocks Samantha Brady Walker Roberts-Horton Dimera Hernandez Dimera
 
Tweet from Kristen's chief thug: Help! We've lost track of our boss, Kristen DiMera, and her hostage!

Tweet from Kristen thug no. 2: Anyone who sees a skinny blonde woman and an unshaven, scruffy, well-tanned doctor should call us immediately at 1-800-555-THUG. All calls will be kept confidential.

Reply from Dr. Chyka: You agreed to work for Kristen DiMera? You have my deepest sympathy.

Reply from Sergio: Working for the DiMeras stinks! I tried to save Elvis from some guy who turned out to be a cop, was thrown in jail, and they never helped me.

Reply from Troy: You've got that right. I once tried to do my bit by running down a snitch, landed in jail and never heard from the DiMeras again. They're the pits.

Reply from Dr. Rolf: I used my brilliant scientific mind to serve the DiMeras for years, but in the end was forced to work as a butler for the version of John Black who was known as "RoboJohn." What a bummer.

Reply from Sami: Oh, cry me a river. Your so-called problems are too trivial to even mention. Nothing tops the fact that EJ cheated on ME! Revenge will be mine!!! P.S., tell Stefano that I'm donating his silk underwear to charity.
 
Post from the Dimera portrait painter : Looking for an assistant. Urgent ! At this rate, I will have to have an operation on both my hands for carpal tunnel syndrome, as I'm asked to paint portraits every other week for the Dimera mansion : first, one of Mr. Stefano Dimera himself, then one (not my finest work, mind you, as my subjects were oh hum) of EJ Dimera and his screeching Sami Brady-Dimera, and lastly, a portrait of Mrs. Screechy Dimera and that witch with the Blue Streak (what's up with that ?) Kate what's her name !!!! If they continue asking me to paint things, I may end up like Van Gogh. :eek:

Reply from Sami : I HATE YOU !!!! But... if you paint a portrait of Abigail Devereaux hanging from a tree branch, I will perhaps consider liking you.
 
Tweet from Eric: The Church says that I can be reinstated as a priest, but I'm not sure I still have a vocation. Woe is me. What can I do?

Reply from "No. 1 Salemite": Become a mime. This town is so full of people who are always running their mouths in public that somebody who never speaks would be really appreciated.

Reply from Nicole: Since you're so humorless lately, check with Sesame Street. Maybe Oscar the Grouch is planning to retire.

Reply from Bo Brady: Consider the Salem P.D. Joining is a breeze and catching criminals is strictly optional.

Reply from Maxine: How about Salem University Medical School's quickie program. You'd have your M.D. by Christmas and you could be one doctor who doesn't drool at the sight of a woman in a hospital gown.

Reply from Aiden: Or try Salem University's fast track law school program. I need help. Since Justin fled town, I'm all alone here with a small army of very strange potential clients.

Reply from "Pub Chowder Lover": How about becoming the Town Square organ grinder. Your screechy twin, Sami, could play the role of the monkey.

Reply from Sami: SHUT UP! EJ can be the organ grinder's monkey. And just so that nobody forgets, I HATE that cheap harlot Abigail and will DESTROY her!!
 
Benchie: Wanted: A couple that is happy and in love to come keep me company. I'm lonely and discontented, all I get are low life bums sleeping on me or snarking argue-mongers I want someone happy to visit for a change...been too long .
 
Eric Brady: So, the Cardinal says I can be a priest again, but, since I hate Nicole, I don't deserve to be one. So...I'm not going to be a priest.

Reply from Daniel Jonas: WHAAT?! After what Kristen put us both through, you want to give up just like that? JUST LIKE THAT?!

Reply from Eric Brady: I'm not giving up. It is simply God's will.

Reply from Daniel Jonas: ...Fine.
 
Facebook post from Marlena: Just got my new online copy of True Vista and oh, look, my darling grandson wrote the cover article; how nice! It's about...uh-oh..... oh, no.... I have to go.

Reply from Roman: Dammit, Sami!

Reply from Sami: What? What did I do THIS time, daddy?

Reply: I don't know, but something tells me you had your hand in this.

Reply from ComaJohn: Is there anything in there about my table-top tryst with Marlena?

Reply from Sami: NO! But there should be! This is all YOUR fault! You ruined my life when....

Reply from everyone in Salem: SHUT UP, SAMI!

Reply from EJ: :clap:
 
Facebook post from EJ to Will: William, I find your behavior towards Samanther to be appalling and disgusting. Even with all of the things I've done to people, I've never betrayed my motha.

Reply from Susan Banks Crumb: That's because you're my perfect sweet baby boy and anyone who doesn't believe me is just mean, mean, mean.
 
Facebook post from Will Horton: You know, I have to wonder if it was NICK who wrote that article, people would give him a freaking parade in his honor!
Reply from Abigail Deveraux: No, they wouldn't.
Reply from Will Horton: Really?
Reply from Abigail Deveraux: Because he wouldn't have written an article in the first place!
Reply from Gabi Hernandez: ...wow. Just when I thought you wouldn't become Sami, Will. Unbelievable. (Hello, from prison, by the way)
Reply from Will Horton: SHUT UP! I'M NOTHING LIKE MY DOO-DOO HEAD MOTHER! I HATE YOU!
Reply from Gabi Hernandez:...
Reply from Abigail Deveraux: ...
Reply from Sami Brady DiMera: ...
Reply from Sonny Kiriakis: ... (You love him. Just remember, you love him)

edited to write out texting phrase....JS
 
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